You can’t save everyone.

Conversation with a generous friend.

Kohaku dit :
So, what happened?

{ Stars&&Moon } Thnx Dad!! dit :
In Stephenie Meyer’s The Host, the ‘Souls’, alien-like critters that… well whatever. They have what they call Callings, intuitive knowledge of what they are best at. Storyteller, Teacher, Mother, Seeker, Healer, and so on and so forth. The beginning of my dream is sort of like that. I’m seeing different people’s lives front their point of view.

At first, it’s just me. I get out of school, St-Louis(where my brother used to go) into a little corner store to go get a snack. I see cute bento boxes. These will come into play later. I got back to school, to the outdoor pool.

Then I see life from this little girl’s point of view. She must’ve been ten, no way was she older.

She starts swimming. And she always puts her heart into everything. There’s this one last race. And all of a sudden, she realizes her calling–it was so… amazing, such an incredible feeling! And when to spun to loop back and finish the race, her friend called out, so she ran to the sidelines to see what was wrong. She got out of the pool and it turned out her friend was just distracting her.

I’ve never felt so much rage in my LIFE.

Blablabla, I start living my own life. I get a white-and-gold horse and Bud. So I go to the corner store again to get lunch. I head to the bento boxes, and I can’T find them. I turn around, look in the mirror at the top of the wall(you know, those weird circular mirors) and I see them. I’ve never felt so PARANOID in my life.

So I got out. Headed back to my ‘appartment’ (Which I never entered. o_o;; ) I see the littler girl arguing with her father. About the swimming team. I step in all happy, because i knew the girl had made it. I tel lthe father it’s fine, she doesn’t need anything. I head to my horse and dog, find the lot empty. There was a sign–literally, a road-like sign, and I knew it meant the day after I’d have my dog and horse back. So I didn’t panic. They could like half a day without food.

Next day, I find the girl surrounded by a few people, including her father. He’s yelling at her more than he was the day before. He asked her, “How much did it cost?!” and she answers, “I just got a little check from grandma, and the neighboor…” I panic. I told him she wouldn’t need anything. I go to the art class to cool down, then to a locker room, to the girl’s locker. I slam on it, saying I’d pay whatever it took, but when the locker opens, it’s empty. And I know that’s a bad sign. I go back upstairs. I hear the father screaming through a sliding door, a door that leads to the closet of their appartment.

I slide it open carefully, enter, stare through a peep hole in the wall. The father’s holding the girl’s arm too tightly, and she’s crying. I can’t make out what he’s saying. I panic, get out and go get a ‘watch man’. I tell him, Listen! He’s hurting her!’ but he doesn’t do anything. I know things are about to get violent, so I shove the door open.

But it make a horrible sound, like a car screeching to a halt. The father hears it, like most everyone, and stomps to the closet, where I am. He still has his daughter in a visceral grasp. He grabs a pretty big kitchen knife. Somewhere along in my rush and panic, I managed to grab the girl and started running. I dragged t he girl along and stried to run around as fast as I could. But someone was telling me to let her go. All the carsign-like signs I’d seen started runnign trough my head, and the father was getting closer. I ran through a list of places where I could hide, where I could be relatively at ease. The art class. I know that the mood’s weird; Roxanne’s freaking out because of her abnormally high grade. But I figured that was as good a place as any; at least getting 100% was positive. Weird, but positive.
I let the girl go.
I heard the screams and I know she can’t run fast enough to escape. I hunker down in the art class, trying to make myself invisible. I don’t want to know the look she’d give me if she saw me letting it all happen. I didn’t want the father to get to me.

Somewhere along the line, I realized, “You can’t save all of them.”

It was…
it wasn’t a classic nightmare.
It was my own personnal hell.

Kohaku dit :
…
Wow…
{ Stars&&Moon } Thnx Dad!! dit :
If I had to go to hell, I’m sure that’s what it’d be like.